Thursday, April 2, 2009

Fart Noises

Jericho wouldn't help me with the post today. So I made a bunch of fart noises and put them down on paper. Check it out...

The trailer for the new Sasha Baron Cohen movie Bruno is right here. Not sure this movie could look any funnier. This man is a genius. I'm so there.

The top 10 ugliest shoes of the past 20 years.

The non-stop promos about LeBron James being on 60 minutes got me hooked, so I stuck around last Sunday night to watch. I wanted to see King James talk about how incredibly talented and rich he is. But of course, CBS knows what they’re doing and put the segment at the end of the show. But I thought what the hell? I’ll watch 60 minutes. Sure, I’m a “grown-up” now. I check on occasion. I eat cereal high in fiber. I’m sure this will be interesting. Fuck was I wrong. The first story was on computer viruses and included such user tips as “don’t click on an email from a friend with the message ‘I just saw this video of you. It was hilarious. Click here’. The journalist turned to the camera and admitted ‘I would’ve clicked on this link. You mean it might not be safe?’ For fuck’s sake. 60 minutes is the reason my mother continues to send email forwards.

Want to see a bunch of slap dicks all together on one list? Here are the starting QBs for the Chicago Bears over the last 20 years. Why do I feel like if you threw them all into a blender out would come Jay Cutler? Hey Jay, enjoy Rashied Davis.

1988: Mike Tomczak
1989: Mike Tomczak
1990: Jim Harbaugh
1991: Jim Harbaugh
1992: Peter Tom Willis, Will Furrer
1993: Jim Harbaugh, Peter Tom Willis
1994: Erik Kramer, Steve Walsh
1995: Erik Kramer 1996: Erik Kramer, Dave Kreig
1997: Erik Kramer, Rick Mirer
1998: Erik Kramer, Steve Stenstrom, Moses Moreno
1999: Shane Matthews, Cade McNown, Jim Miller
2000: Shane Matthews, Cade McNown, Jim Miller
2001: Jim Miller, Shane Matthews
2002: Jim Miller, Chris Chandler, Henry Burris
2003: Kordell Stewart, Chris Chandler, Rex Grossman
2004: Rex Grossman, Jonathan Quinn, Craig Krenzel, Chad Hutchinson
2005: Kyle Orton, Rex Grossman
2006: Rex Grossman
2007: Rex Grossman, Brian Griese, Kyle Orton
2008: Kyle Orton, Rex Grossman

The picture above is courtesy of Fat White Guy and Tim Tebow. I mean, that is Tebow’s girlfriend. We should give him some credit right? God Bless.

And oh shit. Stop the press. Heidi Montag is pregnant.



styrofoam jones said...

dave kreig was on the bears? now it all makes sense.

tahoesanta said...

God, I love that picture

Magglio said...

Amen dude. Amen.

Sa said...

I'm pretty sure that Heidi Montag pregnancy thing was an April Fools joke. Just saying.

The Farm said...

Don't you dare talk shit about Jim Harbaugh. He will destroy you with enthusiasm unknown to mankind.

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