Monday, April 14, 2008

Hot Studs with Moustaches



Foreword: Everything you’re about to read in this post is entirely true. Except for the part about the donkey. That’s only half true.

We have some handy dandy tracking tools set up on our site (NERD ALERT). Nothing that makes us important or cool by any means. But enough that we can tell roughly where and how readers found A & M. Let’s take for instance search. Did you know if you Google the words “Shaun Alexander’s Vagina” then our blog pops up first? Amazing isn’t it? (If you don’t have a lot of time today you can stop reading now. This is in fact the coolest statistic of all. I cannot tell you how proud this makes us. I feel like we’ve finally done something right in this world.)

Of course if you search “Apples Moustaches” you’ll find us, but a misspelling like “Apples and Mustaches” will send you elsewhere. Searching for “Apples Blog Magglio” leads you to our site but “Jericho is a ball sniffer,” unfortunately, will not. Now here’s where it gets really interesting. These are actual terms users have typed in recently which have lead them to our site. Again, we are not making any of this up.
  • Gay Boots and Moustaches
  • Funny Arnold Lines
  • Russell Crowe with Moustache
  • Professional real looking moustache movie moustache
  • Shitty looking real estate
  • Elijah Woods Moustache
  • Fuzzies Pizza
  • Gary Radnich
  • Raconteurs at Bimbos
  • Hot Studs with Moustaches

Here are terms that will not lead you to our site but we secretly wish would.
  • Sweet candied yams
  • Fucking coastist bastards
  • Bloggers with big ol’ donkey dicks
  • One-eyed Patch
  • Bam Bam Willis in your ear bitch
  • LinceCain
  • Josh’s underpants
  • The Great John Bowker
  • Is Mily Cyrus hot or is she too young for us to even be asking the question?
  • Jackie Joyner Kersee

2 comments:

Underz' said...

I searched for "blogging slump" and got right to your page. You guys are streakier than the Denver Nuggets. Great post, great post, great post, boring, great post, boring, great post.

Still, more great posts than boring, but I want excellency always, Overpants and Delores... (You know which one of you is Overpants, so the other, by default, is Delores.)

In fact, here's a compliment: At lunchtime, BASED ON YOUR AWESOME POSTS OF THE LAST MONTH UNTIL LAST WEEK WHICH SUCKED MY HAIRY NUT, my site-check order is:

--Yahoo Fantasy Baseball
--AOL email
--Apps and 'Staches
--ESPN.com
--Drudge Report
--Entertainent Weekly/SpoilerFix
--Maggliosvagine.com
--Jerichoeatsdiarrehia.com

You guys were sixth or seventh before. Be proud. Seriously.

Anonymous said...

My recent site-check in order:

A&M
Slapmyroundass.com
giantsallouttodayandeveryday.com
pinkisthenewblack.org
turninyourpotsmokingneighborforcash.gov
analrashesofthe1990's on buttmd.com
hillaryisalyingschemingbitchwhodidn'tapprovethismessage.org
soyouwanttolearnbasicswahilli.com
melkiperhairsecretsrevealed.com