Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Apples and Moutaches - Run Yo Game Miss Pringle!

(Hopping up on my soap box.) I love MTV. I soak up everything, good and bad, like a 17-year-old girl at a high school gangbang. One of the best shows is True Life. (And Made and Real World/Road Rules). It’s a simple premise. It takes a look at a cross section of young people across a range of specific topics such as ‘True Life: I’m dead broke’ or ‘True Life: I’m in a mixed relationship’ or the one I most recently finished watching ‘True Life: Peer Pressure’. One of the situations explored a Hooters waitress with teeny tiny tits. She was being peer pressured to get a boob job. I’ll skip the middle part but in the end she gets the boobs and her tips at work skyrocket and she moves in with her boyfriend. Her life is suddenly perfect. See future youth of America? All it takes is some succulent C cups and you too can find love, money, power, leadership, street knowledge and wisdom. (Getting off my soap box…for now.)

I’ve got a baseball question I need your help on please. Last year I was at a Giants game and we were down 4 in the 9th inning. I turned my hat on inside out and ensured everyone in my group did the same. (That’s called a rally cap to all of you out there not versed in baseball superstition.) Lo and behold the Giants score 4 runs and force extra innings. So here’s the question, when we go top 10 all tied up does my hat stay in the rally position? Do we mess with the rally Gods by keeping them on? Or is it worse to change up the routine that got us tied up in the first place? Discuss.

How weak are bachelorette parties? We have a friend staying with us who is about to spend the weekend in San Jose (no, really) at a bachelorette party. You should hear the bullshit they have planned. A spa day. A slumber party. Cheesy games like ‘Pin the penis on the model’ etc. Manicures. And a lingerie party (not what it seems, I asked, its more of a gift giving then a show and tell.) Are you kidding me? Where are the steak dinners, the booze, the bongs and the general rambunctious shenanigans? Thank. God. I’m. A. Dude.

Last Friday night we went to a new restaurant (SPQR) which is a spin-off of a popular local restaurant (A16) and it got me thinking….about spin-offs. TV spin-offs in particular. Which are the best ones of all time? Melrose came from 90210. A Different World came from The Cosby Show. Fraiser came from Cheers. I feel like I’m missing some big ones. TV knowledge is one area of friends I do not have covered. For movies I go to Jericho. For Pop Culture I go to Sa. For the latest in music I go to RK or Dana. But for TV…nothing. Anyone out there want to be my TV lifeline?

I’m not giving up on Barry Zito. It’s not going to happen, yet. Sure, he’s 0-4 and gave up a 2-run single to the pitcher Brandon Webb today. But his curve didn’t look too bad. Plus, he got exactly 1 run of support today. Where were the doubles from Castillo and the slap singles from Freddy Lewis and Eugenio Velez? Interesting stat Jericho just dropped on me…Brandon Webb is making $5.5 million this year and Zito is pulling in $14.5. But his curve looked good. No?

One week and counting…“Any poor souls that trespass against us, whether it be beast or man.”


Anonymous said...

Rally Caps: I think that after one's team takes care of the defecit which initialized the donning of the rally cap, one turns their hat back to normal "right-side-out" positioning. If said team falls behind again, reinstate the rally cap.

It's pushing it if one leaves it on after the defecit has been overcome.

Anonymous said...

You forgot "Respect" as in Money, Power, Respect, Leadership, Street Knowledge, and Wisdom. This was Master P's intro on Snoops No Limit record. Get it right yo.

Yours in crime,

Dirt Diver

Magglio said...

Dude. Dirt Diver. You are the man. So glad somebody caught the reference. It was from the 'Da Game is to be Sold, Not to be told' album.'Thanks for the correction.


Anonymous said...

My top three spinoffs:

The Simpsons
The Jeffersons
The Colbert Report

Which brings up the question...will "The Office" spinoff have a "The" in its name, obviously the mark of success?

Does The Office (US) count as a spinoff on its own?

M.A.S.H. was a movie first (I've never watched either though). The Hills counts. The multitude of Real World spinoffs, Law & Orders and CSIs...

***Barry Zito needs to come up with a knuckleball (I've always dominated you with mine) and a good 30mph changeup to keep people off his 80mph fastball.